Teachable Teacher

Even though I’m not currently pastoring, ministry should still be a daily part of a Believer’s life.  A few days ago, I found myself helping out another brother in Christ who was going through some difficulties in his marriage. After much prayer, God began to reveal to me the things that I should speak so that 1) This man could straighten out his thinking and 2) He could begin restoring his marriage.  This series of The 3 Duties of a Husband are those things that God has shown me throughout my own marriage. I hope it helps…

Privelege vs. Duty

Guys listen carefully…It’s a PRIVELEGE when a daughter of God chooses to trust you with her heart, her body, her  emotions, and all her inner beauty that she refuses to allow anyone else see. As a result, there are certain things that God would require of us as men who would care for these gifts. Everything you do for this woman is grounded in your self-sacrificing love for her.

But what do you do when it doesn’t feel like a privelege? Is it normal at times for a relationship to feel burdensome? Anyone that has been married for any significant amount of time will certainly affirm that you are not alone. But for a man, this is when you still must care for this daughter of God.

Emotions can be unstable and therefore unreliable as the foundation of your marriage. When your emotions are telling you that it is no privelege to care for this woman, that is the moment when you must let it become your duty.

The Husband should be a provider.

As we begin to look at the first duty of a man, let’s begin with the very 1st step, providing. Provision is what separates the men from the boys. A man who provides for his wife and kids is not a meere boy lost in a game of house. He is a supply line of strength and nourishment to his family. 

If a guy no longer provides for his wife and kids, he literally quits on his commitment and God-given purpose. He metaphorically runs back to mom’s basement to hide under the safety of his Star Wars sheets. Some boys, regardless of their age, are simply not ready for marriage. If you are one of these guys, don’t get married. Don’t ruin another poor woman’s life. She should not have to carry the burden of caring for you and all your immature, self-indulgent tendancies. Don’t have kids. If you can’t provide stability for your own life, what makes you think that having kids will help?

Here are just some areas in which a husband should be a PROVIDER:

• The husband should provide for his family financially.
• The husband should provide for his family physically.
• The husband should provide for his family spiritually.
• The husband should provide for his family emotionally.

So if you’re not married, go through this checklist and make sure that you’re ready to man-up before you commit to a woman. If you are married, then do a self-check. Are you keeping up on all of these areas of being the provider? If you’re gutsy enough, give your wife full freedom to give you honest answers as to how you’re doing in these areas. The answers may suprise you, and help you to learn more about the needs of your spouse than you ever knew before.